Menumbuhkan sikap positif dan motorik kasar
pada anak usia tiga tahun
Pada sebuah acara seminar kecil tentang cara mendidik anak, seorang pembicara bertanya kepada peserta seminar.”Menurut Anda mulai usia berapa seorang anak menunjukkan kerajinan??” Beberapa dari kami menebak saja.Ada yang menjawab lima tahun. ..duabelas tahun....tujuh tahun....remaja...tapi tidak ada satupun jawaban yang benar. Karena tidak ada yang berhasil menjawab dengan benar, sang pembicara akhirnya memberitahu. Ternyata jawaban yang benar adalah tiga tahun. Pada usia tiga tahun seorang anak mulai menunjukkan kerajinannya.
“Coba bandingkan anak usia tiga tahun dengan usia anak di atasnya...” Biasanya anak-anak yang lebih tua mulai menolak bila diminta untuk melakukan sesuatu, mengembalikan mainannya ke tempatnya misalnya. Sedangkan anak usia tiga tahun, sedang rajin-rajinnya bila dimintai tolong. Bahkan tanpa disuruh sekalipun mereka suka meniru pekerjaan yang biasanya dilakukan oleh orang dewasa. Kalau ayahnya suka mencuci motor atau mobil seorang anak laki-laki biasanya ikut-ikutan melakukan hal sama. Mencuci sepedanya misalnya. Mau menyapu atau mengepel rumah seperti ibunya.
Oleh karena itu pada usia ini sebaiknya orangtua memanfaatkan kesempatan untuk menanamkan tanggungjawab, kemandirian dan sikap rajin pada anak. Banyak orangtua yang justru melarang anaknya untuk memegang ini dan itu, melakukan ini dan itu, tanpa mengarahkan dan memberi kesempatan anak untuk bereksplorasi. Akhirnya anak menjadi tidak berkembang dengan optimal. Jangan sampai sikap protektif kita sebagai orangtua menghambat pertumbuhan anak.Beri anak kesempatan untuk melakukan tugas-tugas kecil yang sesuai dengan kemampuannya. Contohnya: merapikan mainannya sendiri, makan dan minum sendiri, memakai bajunya sendiri, dimintai tolong mengambil benda yang bisa dengan mudah diambilnya. Pokoknya tugas-tugas yang mampu dia lakukan. Arahkan untuk melakukan tugas-tugas itu dengan benar, bila anak keliru melakukannya. Beri penjelasan kepada anak fungsi dari setiap aktifitas. Aktifitas menyapu misalnya “ Ade ayo kita sapu rumah kita supaya rumah kita jadi rapi dan bersih” Kalaupun hasil yang anak kita kerjakan tidak sesuai dengan harapan kita,makan sendiri misalnya, makanannya bertumpahan kemana-mana. Jangan langsung marah-marah dan menyuapi anak, tapi teruslah memberinya kesempatan kepadanya setelah selesai makan minta anak atau bersama-sama memungut atau membersihkan tumpahan makanannya. Bila mau mengantisipasi supaya tidak terlalu berserakan kemana-mana, tempat duduk anak dan makanannya dialasi dengan koran.
Satu hal yang tidak kalah penting adalah berilah pujian kepada anak bila melakukan aktifitas dengan baik (walaupun tidak sempurna). Pujian yang kita berikan akan menjadi pendukung bagi anak untuk melakukan yang baik.
Pada usia ini gerakan motorik kasar pada anak juga mengalami kemajuan yang baik sekali, sehingga dengan memberi anak kesempatan untuk banyak bergerak dan melakukan aktifitas yang bermanfaat, perkembangan motorik kasarnya akan lebih maksimal perkembangannya.
Jadi selain sikap positif anak (tanggungjawab, kemandirian dan rajin) akan berkembang, motorik kasarnya (yang melibatkan gerakan seperti berjalan, melompat, berputar, berlari ,dll) juga akan maksimal.
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Rabu, 24 Maret 2010
Senin, 15 Maret 2010
Hargailah Anak Sesuai Keberadaannya
Pada iklan sebuah produk di televisi ditayangkan seorang ibu yang heran seorang teman anaknya lebih tinggi dibandingkan anaknya. Bahkan sangking penasaran ia lalu menjejerkan anaknya sendiri dengan teman anaknya itu dan bertanya kenapa teman anaknya lebih tinggi dibandingkan anaknya. Di iklan yang lain ada tayangan yang serupa tapi tak sama. Di sebuah kelas TK seorang guru meminta murid-muridnya memasangkan mata jerapah di tempat yang tepat pada sebuah boneka jerapah. Anak yang lebih tinggi dapat dengan mudah memasang mata jerapah itu dibandingkan anak yang bertubuh pendek.
Ternyata gambaran serupa bukan hanya terjadi di iklan-iklan, tapi juga dalam keseharian kita sebagai orangtua dan pendidik. “Si Ivan kok bisa dapat 100 kamu cuma 70!!!”. Seringnya kita mendengar orangtua yang membanding-bandingkan nilai ulangan anaknya dengan anak temannya. Bukan itu saja dalam rumah juga seorang anak kerap dibandingkan dengan kakak atau adiknya. “Kamu kok tidak seperti kakakmu rajin...kamu tuh malas banget kalau mama lihat!!!”. Sadar atau tidak sadar, sengaja atau tidak sengaja membanding-bandingkan anak bukan hal yang jarang kita lihat bahkan kita lakukan.
Sebagai orangtua Anda dan saya tentu menginginkan yang terbaik untuk buah hati kita. Ada beberapa orangtua yang dengan sengaja dan sadar memakai metode membandingkan ini untuk memicu motivasi anaknya untuk menjadi lebih baik bagi anak lain.Memicu daya bersaing, begitu alasannya. Mungkin ada benarnya tapi yang pasti lebih banyak bahayanya.
Apa saja bahayanya?
1. Anak menjadi tidak percaya diri dan cenderung ingin menjadi seperti seseorang seperti yang diinginkan orangtuanya.Bahayanya dia bisa menjadi pribadi yang tidak berkembang sesuai kelebihan yang ada pada dirinya, karena berpatokan pada orang lain yang jelas-jelas berbeda dengan dia.
2. Marah terselubung dalam diri anak baik pada orangtuanya, dirinya sendiri maupun anak yang menjadi patokan perbandingan. Marah ini tidak terlihat secara fisik ketika seseorang masih anak-anak tetapi seperti “bom atom” yang siap kapan saja meledak. Pemberontakkan masa remaja misalnya.
3. Berkembangnya rasa iri atau sirik pada diri anak.
4. Rasa iri atau sirik membuahkan sikap bersaing yang tidak sehat baik dalam pelajaran di sekolah maupun keseharian. Segala cara dilakukan entah baik atau tidak baik untuk menjadi yang terbaik. Sikap ini bisa bertahan hingga dia menjadi dewasa. Ini seringkali terlihat di dunia kerja. Persaingan yang tidak sehat untuk mencapai jabatan tertentu,’ menjatuhkan’ orang lain bila perlu. Di kehidupan bertetangga juga sering terlihat. Kalau ada tetangga yang mempunyai barang baru, muncul keinginan menjadikannya bahan ‘gosip’ atau tidak mau kalah dengan membeli barang yang sama atau lebih bagus dari yang dipunyai tetangganya itu.
Seorang pakar psikologi anak pernah mengatakan bahwa kalau kita memang mau memakai metode perbandingan . Pakailah perbandingan perkembangan dalam diri anak itu sendiri pada periode yang lalu dan sekarang. Misalnya pada raport Andi semester pertama ada satu mata pelajaran yang merah,dibandingkan dengan semester kedua ada dua mata pelajaran yang merah.Itu artinya nilai Andi mengalami kemunduran. Contoh lainnya Ira malas merapikan tempat tidur bulan lalu tetapi bulan ini dia sudah mau merapikan tempat tidurnya tanpa disuruh walaupun tidak serapih kakaknya. Itu artinya Ira mengalami kemajuan dalam kerapihan.
Oleh karena lebih banyak bahayanya dibandingkan positifnya, jauh lebih baik Anda dan saya memilih untuk menghargai anak sesuai kepribadiannya, sesuai minat dan bakatnya, sesuai kelebihan dan kekurangannya, sesuai keunikannya.Hargai anak sesuai keberadaannya.
Pada iklan sebuah produk di televisi ditayangkan seorang ibu yang heran seorang teman anaknya lebih tinggi dibandingkan anaknya. Bahkan sangking penasaran ia lalu menjejerkan anaknya sendiri dengan teman anaknya itu dan bertanya kenapa teman anaknya lebih tinggi dibandingkan anaknya. Di iklan yang lain ada tayangan yang serupa tapi tak sama. Di sebuah kelas TK seorang guru meminta murid-muridnya memasangkan mata jerapah di tempat yang tepat pada sebuah boneka jerapah. Anak yang lebih tinggi dapat dengan mudah memasang mata jerapah itu dibandingkan anak yang bertubuh pendek.
Ternyata gambaran serupa bukan hanya terjadi di iklan-iklan, tapi juga dalam keseharian kita sebagai orangtua dan pendidik. “Si Ivan kok bisa dapat 100 kamu cuma 70!!!”. Seringnya kita mendengar orangtua yang membanding-bandingkan nilai ulangan anaknya dengan anak temannya. Bukan itu saja dalam rumah juga seorang anak kerap dibandingkan dengan kakak atau adiknya. “Kamu kok tidak seperti kakakmu rajin...kamu tuh malas banget kalau mama lihat!!!”. Sadar atau tidak sadar, sengaja atau tidak sengaja membanding-bandingkan anak bukan hal yang jarang kita lihat bahkan kita lakukan.
Sebagai orangtua Anda dan saya tentu menginginkan yang terbaik untuk buah hati kita. Ada beberapa orangtua yang dengan sengaja dan sadar memakai metode membandingkan ini untuk memicu motivasi anaknya untuk menjadi lebih baik bagi anak lain.Memicu daya bersaing, begitu alasannya. Mungkin ada benarnya tapi yang pasti lebih banyak bahayanya.
Apa saja bahayanya?
1. Anak menjadi tidak percaya diri dan cenderung ingin menjadi seperti seseorang seperti yang diinginkan orangtuanya.Bahayanya dia bisa menjadi pribadi yang tidak berkembang sesuai kelebihan yang ada pada dirinya, karena berpatokan pada orang lain yang jelas-jelas berbeda dengan dia.
2. Marah terselubung dalam diri anak baik pada orangtuanya, dirinya sendiri maupun anak yang menjadi patokan perbandingan. Marah ini tidak terlihat secara fisik ketika seseorang masih anak-anak tetapi seperti “bom atom” yang siap kapan saja meledak. Pemberontakkan masa remaja misalnya.
3. Berkembangnya rasa iri atau sirik pada diri anak.
4. Rasa iri atau sirik membuahkan sikap bersaing yang tidak sehat baik dalam pelajaran di sekolah maupun keseharian. Segala cara dilakukan entah baik atau tidak baik untuk menjadi yang terbaik. Sikap ini bisa bertahan hingga dia menjadi dewasa. Ini seringkali terlihat di dunia kerja. Persaingan yang tidak sehat untuk mencapai jabatan tertentu,’ menjatuhkan’ orang lain bila perlu. Di kehidupan bertetangga juga sering terlihat. Kalau ada tetangga yang mempunyai barang baru, muncul keinginan menjadikannya bahan ‘gosip’ atau tidak mau kalah dengan membeli barang yang sama atau lebih bagus dari yang dipunyai tetangganya itu.
Seorang pakar psikologi anak pernah mengatakan bahwa kalau kita memang mau memakai metode perbandingan . Pakailah perbandingan perkembangan dalam diri anak itu sendiri pada periode yang lalu dan sekarang. Misalnya pada raport Andi semester pertama ada satu mata pelajaran yang merah,dibandingkan dengan semester kedua ada dua mata pelajaran yang merah.Itu artinya nilai Andi mengalami kemunduran. Contoh lainnya Ira malas merapikan tempat tidur bulan lalu tetapi bulan ini dia sudah mau merapikan tempat tidurnya tanpa disuruh walaupun tidak serapih kakaknya. Itu artinya Ira mengalami kemajuan dalam kerapihan.
Oleh karena lebih banyak bahayanya dibandingkan positifnya, jauh lebih baik Anda dan saya memilih untuk menghargai anak sesuai kepribadiannya, sesuai minat dan bakatnya, sesuai kelebihan dan kekurangannya, sesuai keunikannya.Hargai anak sesuai keberadaannya.
Selasa, 02 Maret 2010
Getting Help for Troubled Teens: When and Where to Go
Getting Help for Troubled Teens: When and Where to Go
By: Heather Peters
When your teenager starts to get out of hand you have to ask yourself some hard questions. The first step is to honestly evaluate how you think you're doing when communicating with your teen. Do you feel you are sharing valuable information and time? Or do you feel there is a communication gap and he's hiding something?
Look for these warning signs:
* Low self-esteem
* Out of touch with reality
* Sudden personality changes and mood swings
* Violent behavior
* Drop in grades and school performance
* Self destructive actions or language (suicide threats or extreme diet & exercise)
* Reclusive tendencies
* Debilitating fears
Any of those behaviors done on a frequent basis can indicate a problem. At this point you should seek outside assistance. Don't be too proud to ask for help.
If you feel your efforts aren't working (or aren't good enough) first enlist the assistance of your extended circle of friends and family. Get everyone involved to bolster the spirits of your teen. Show him that he has a support system in place that he can count in. Work on building back trust in your relationship. If your child opens up to another family member better than you, keep your resentment inside, the focus should be on helping your teen.
Sometimes you need to bring in professionals. Don't wait too long on this step if your child is getting out of control. A delay can be costly. But where should you turn next? Consider these options:
School guidance counselor
This person deals with teenagers (especially troubled ones) on a daily basis, they are an excellent resource for insight into what might be happening among the social scenes at school. They also have quick easy access to your child during the day.
Outside counselors and psychologists
These professionals have degrees in counseling and therapy. Some specialize in therapy while others focus on testing. Its best to find someone who deals with teenagers a lot, they usually relate better to the younger generation.
Social workers
These individuals are often called in to work with families as a group and are quite familiar with emotional problems in a social setting. They can help identify issues related to family dynamics. This can be helpful if there are frequent conflicts at home.
Psychiatrists
These are medical doctors (yes, they went to medical school) who are allowed to prescribe medication and can hospitalize patients. Generally you would reserve this professional for a later step as licensed counselors are often a less expensive and personal approach to teen troubles.
Therapy can become expensive so check with your insurance plan to see which services are covered. Some companies impose limits on the type of services available and/or the frequency of visits. If cost is an issue don't forget that school counselors are typically free. You could also contact a local university or college, free clinics, counseling training programs, and state run offices. Some offices offer sliding scale pricing for lower income families. It's important not to let money stop you from seeking help. The wellbeing of your child and your family depend on it.
Author Bio
troubled-teens.topicreviews.com seeks to provide assistance for teens and their families to help during stressful times. All information in this article is the opinion of the author and not meant to replace sound medical and professional advice. Always seek the assistance of a professional in dealing with a troubled teen.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
By: Heather Peters
When your teenager starts to get out of hand you have to ask yourself some hard questions. The first step is to honestly evaluate how you think you're doing when communicating with your teen. Do you feel you are sharing valuable information and time? Or do you feel there is a communication gap and he's hiding something?
Look for these warning signs:
* Low self-esteem
* Out of touch with reality
* Sudden personality changes and mood swings
* Violent behavior
* Drop in grades and school performance
* Self destructive actions or language (suicide threats or extreme diet & exercise)
* Reclusive tendencies
* Debilitating fears
Any of those behaviors done on a frequent basis can indicate a problem. At this point you should seek outside assistance. Don't be too proud to ask for help.
If you feel your efforts aren't working (or aren't good enough) first enlist the assistance of your extended circle of friends and family. Get everyone involved to bolster the spirits of your teen. Show him that he has a support system in place that he can count in. Work on building back trust in your relationship. If your child opens up to another family member better than you, keep your resentment inside, the focus should be on helping your teen.
Sometimes you need to bring in professionals. Don't wait too long on this step if your child is getting out of control. A delay can be costly. But where should you turn next? Consider these options:
School guidance counselor
This person deals with teenagers (especially troubled ones) on a daily basis, they are an excellent resource for insight into what might be happening among the social scenes at school. They also have quick easy access to your child during the day.
Outside counselors and psychologists
These professionals have degrees in counseling and therapy. Some specialize in therapy while others focus on testing. Its best to find someone who deals with teenagers a lot, they usually relate better to the younger generation.
Social workers
These individuals are often called in to work with families as a group and are quite familiar with emotional problems in a social setting. They can help identify issues related to family dynamics. This can be helpful if there are frequent conflicts at home.
Psychiatrists
These are medical doctors (yes, they went to medical school) who are allowed to prescribe medication and can hospitalize patients. Generally you would reserve this professional for a later step as licensed counselors are often a less expensive and personal approach to teen troubles.
Therapy can become expensive so check with your insurance plan to see which services are covered. Some companies impose limits on the type of services available and/or the frequency of visits. If cost is an issue don't forget that school counselors are typically free. You could also contact a local university or college, free clinics, counseling training programs, and state run offices. Some offices offer sliding scale pricing for lower income families. It's important not to let money stop you from seeking help. The wellbeing of your child and your family depend on it.
Author Bio
troubled-teens.topicreviews.com seeks to provide assistance for teens and their families to help during stressful times. All information in this article is the opinion of the author and not meant to replace sound medical and professional advice. Always seek the assistance of a professional in dealing with a troubled teen.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
Inappropriate Behavior as a "Teachable Moment"
Inappropriate Behavior as a "Teachable Moment"
By: Norma Schmidt
Two boys in a first grade classroom were arguing loudly over an item they both wanted to use at the same time.
Their teacher approached them in a friendly way and said, "Boys, it sounds like you two are having a problem. Let's talk it out."
One of the boys told his side of the story, his face still tense but his voice lowered to an "indoor" volume. The second boy listened and then, without any prompting, came up with a solution to which the first boy readily agreed.
"Great job!" the teacher beamed. "See? You can talk it out!"
A TEACHING PERSPECTIVE CAN PRODUCE AMAZING RESULTS WHEN KIDS BEHAVE INAPPROPRIATELY.
If we approach unwanted behavior from the perspective of our child's judge/jury/jailer, our first impulse may be to punish.
But punishment doesn't teach kids what they SHOULD be doing. It doesn't expand kids' problem-solving skills, teach them how to repair social mistakes, or improve their social perception.
Fortunately, punishment isn't the only available tool.
WE CAN CHOOSE TO VIEW THE INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR AS A "TEACHABLE MOMENT."
When the teacher in the story above heard the two boys arguing, she spotted a chance to teach better social problem-solving.
Inviting the boys to "talk it out" reminded them of their capacity to problem-solve without shouting or arguing. They saw that "talking it out" could work, and they were more likely to "talk it out" next time.
A teaching perspective has room for punishment in some cases, but the focus is on helping kids learn the skills they need to behave appropriately.
If we view inappropriate behavior as a learning opportunity for the child, new options open up.
HERE ARE TEN CHOICES FOR MAKING THE MOST OF A TEACHABLE MOMENT:
1. Redirect the child toward a more appropriate activity.
2. Inform the child that what they're doing "isn't a good idea" or "isn't safe."
3. Give a friendly reminder about the rule the child needs to be following.
4. Guide the child through the steps of apologizing.
5. Ask the child to consider how others feel when she engages in the inappropriate behavior.
6. Help the child make amends to anyone negatively affected by the inappropriate behavior. Ask, "What can we do to help (name of person) feel better now?"
7. In the case of a conflict, prompt the children to "talk it out," providing assistance as needed.
8. Give a new rule, if the situation wasn't covered by the rules the child has already been taught.
9. Invite the child to think of a better to way to ask for what they want or need in the situation.
10. Teach the child appropriate words/behaviors to replace the inappropriate ones.
The rules of appropriate social behavior take a long time to learn and an even longer time to internalize as habits. Even adults don't do it perfectly!
When we use our child's behavior mistakes as opportunities to offer guidance, we're giving our child their best chance to become more kind, responsible and socially competent.
Author Bio
Norma Schmidt is a parent of two and a former Lutheran minister. Her career includes serving as a pastor, campus minister and cancer center chaplain. She has also worked with children with disabilities. Norma offers workshops on parenting and on living with serious illness. Her writing has appeared in "Coping with Cancer" magazine. Download her free report, "61 Great Ways to Teach Kids about Money" and look through her other articles by going to www.ParentCafeOnline.com.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
By: Norma Schmidt
Two boys in a first grade classroom were arguing loudly over an item they both wanted to use at the same time.
Their teacher approached them in a friendly way and said, "Boys, it sounds like you two are having a problem. Let's talk it out."
One of the boys told his side of the story, his face still tense but his voice lowered to an "indoor" volume. The second boy listened and then, without any prompting, came up with a solution to which the first boy readily agreed.
"Great job!" the teacher beamed. "See? You can talk it out!"
A TEACHING PERSPECTIVE CAN PRODUCE AMAZING RESULTS WHEN KIDS BEHAVE INAPPROPRIATELY.
If we approach unwanted behavior from the perspective of our child's judge/jury/jailer, our first impulse may be to punish.
But punishment doesn't teach kids what they SHOULD be doing. It doesn't expand kids' problem-solving skills, teach them how to repair social mistakes, or improve their social perception.
Fortunately, punishment isn't the only available tool.
WE CAN CHOOSE TO VIEW THE INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR AS A "TEACHABLE MOMENT."
When the teacher in the story above heard the two boys arguing, she spotted a chance to teach better social problem-solving.
Inviting the boys to "talk it out" reminded them of their capacity to problem-solve without shouting or arguing. They saw that "talking it out" could work, and they were more likely to "talk it out" next time.
A teaching perspective has room for punishment in some cases, but the focus is on helping kids learn the skills they need to behave appropriately.
If we view inappropriate behavior as a learning opportunity for the child, new options open up.
HERE ARE TEN CHOICES FOR MAKING THE MOST OF A TEACHABLE MOMENT:
1. Redirect the child toward a more appropriate activity.
2. Inform the child that what they're doing "isn't a good idea" or "isn't safe."
3. Give a friendly reminder about the rule the child needs to be following.
4. Guide the child through the steps of apologizing.
5. Ask the child to consider how others feel when she engages in the inappropriate behavior.
6. Help the child make amends to anyone negatively affected by the inappropriate behavior. Ask, "What can we do to help (name of person) feel better now?"
7. In the case of a conflict, prompt the children to "talk it out," providing assistance as needed.
8. Give a new rule, if the situation wasn't covered by the rules the child has already been taught.
9. Invite the child to think of a better to way to ask for what they want or need in the situation.
10. Teach the child appropriate words/behaviors to replace the inappropriate ones.
The rules of appropriate social behavior take a long time to learn and an even longer time to internalize as habits. Even adults don't do it perfectly!
When we use our child's behavior mistakes as opportunities to offer guidance, we're giving our child their best chance to become more kind, responsible and socially competent.
Author Bio
Norma Schmidt is a parent of two and a former Lutheran minister. Her career includes serving as a pastor, campus minister and cancer center chaplain. She has also worked with children with disabilities. Norma offers workshops on parenting and on living with serious illness. Her writing has appeared in "Coping with Cancer" magazine. Download her free report, "61 Great Ways to Teach Kids about Money" and look through her other articles by going to www.ParentCafeOnline.com.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
Selecting Furniture for a Play Room
Selecting Furniture for a Play Room
By: Bob Benson
The furniture you choose to put in your play room depends mostly on your family's definition of "play room." If your play room is for a toddler to have lots of running room, your furniture will differ greatly from the play room designed to give adults the feel of a sports bar atmosphere.
If your play room is designed with a mobile child in mind, you probably will not need much furniture. An appropriately sized table for the child to sit at while coloring or drawing, playing with puzzles or doing crafts is a must along with a sturdy chair. A good toy box that could double as a hope chest for the child later is another good furniture item to include in the room. Throw in a couple of chairs for the kids to wallow on and your furniture needs are met!
A play room for older kids will differ in its furniture needs. A table with sturdy chairs will still be vital. Older kids who like to watch television or movies and play video games will also need a solid entertainment center or tv stand on which to hold the tv set. You'll need more seating for older kids, too. They tend to have more friends visiting and will require more seating area.
If your play room is for adults, furnish it accordingly. In addition to any favorite games, like pool or billiards, you will want your play room to have quality furniture in it too. Select a nice sofa or sectional with plenty of seating. Select coffee and end tables that can move quickly to accommodate snack trays or your favorite board game. If you are going to have video games in your play room, make sure your seating is placed for good game play.
If your play room is going to be used for hobbies, make sure your furniture is suited for the hobby of your choice. If your hobby is scrap booking, you will need a good, comfortable desk and a nice chair. A hobby such as needle point would require a comfortable chair with good back support and good lighting. If writing is your hobby, your "play room" may take on the look of a home office instead. Invest in good furniture that includes a computer desk and a comfortable chair.
No matter what your family's definition of "play room" is, you can utilize it best and get the most enjoyment from it when you furnish it according to its intended use. Don't put a lavish sofa in your play room if it will be subjected to frequent spills and gooey drops of food. Likewise, don't expect to be comfortable on furniture that is way past its last legs. Know your space, know your needs, and know your budget. When you take those things into consideration, you will make good decisions regarding the furniture and accessories you select for your play room and you can concentrate on what the room was intended for - having fun!
Author Bio
Bob Benson is the founder of Furniture online. You can check out our website at www.doll-furniture.info
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
By: Bob Benson
The furniture you choose to put in your play room depends mostly on your family's definition of "play room." If your play room is for a toddler to have lots of running room, your furniture will differ greatly from the play room designed to give adults the feel of a sports bar atmosphere.
If your play room is designed with a mobile child in mind, you probably will not need much furniture. An appropriately sized table for the child to sit at while coloring or drawing, playing with puzzles or doing crafts is a must along with a sturdy chair. A good toy box that could double as a hope chest for the child later is another good furniture item to include in the room. Throw in a couple of chairs for the kids to wallow on and your furniture needs are met!
A play room for older kids will differ in its furniture needs. A table with sturdy chairs will still be vital. Older kids who like to watch television or movies and play video games will also need a solid entertainment center or tv stand on which to hold the tv set. You'll need more seating for older kids, too. They tend to have more friends visiting and will require more seating area.
If your play room is for adults, furnish it accordingly. In addition to any favorite games, like pool or billiards, you will want your play room to have quality furniture in it too. Select a nice sofa or sectional with plenty of seating. Select coffee and end tables that can move quickly to accommodate snack trays or your favorite board game. If you are going to have video games in your play room, make sure your seating is placed for good game play.
If your play room is going to be used for hobbies, make sure your furniture is suited for the hobby of your choice. If your hobby is scrap booking, you will need a good, comfortable desk and a nice chair. A hobby such as needle point would require a comfortable chair with good back support and good lighting. If writing is your hobby, your "play room" may take on the look of a home office instead. Invest in good furniture that includes a computer desk and a comfortable chair.
No matter what your family's definition of "play room" is, you can utilize it best and get the most enjoyment from it when you furnish it according to its intended use. Don't put a lavish sofa in your play room if it will be subjected to frequent spills and gooey drops of food. Likewise, don't expect to be comfortable on furniture that is way past its last legs. Know your space, know your needs, and know your budget. When you take those things into consideration, you will make good decisions regarding the furniture and accessories you select for your play room and you can concentrate on what the room was intended for - having fun!
Author Bio
Bob Benson is the founder of Furniture online. You can check out our website at www.doll-furniture.info
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
Baby Crib Advice and Tips
By: Martin Smith
Congratulations! You have just learned that you are having a baby. Whether this is your first or not you need to look at cribs. Do you have one already? Is it an antique? A second hand crib whether antique or not needs to be carefully looked at. This is for the safety of your new baby.
The screws, bolts, and/or other fasteners should all be in place. Are they loose? Will the position of the mattress hold under your baby's weight? It is imperative that this be tested before you put your baby in the crib. Take something that approximates the weight of your baby at about 4 months old. Bounce it off the mattress to be certain it will hold its position. If it doesn't it could cause serious injury to your baby or worse.
When setting up the nursery (if it isn't already up) consider very carefully where you will place the crib. If you place the crib near a window and you have Venetian blinds, either shorten the cords or anchor them somewhere that your baby can't reach and get a hold of them. If it all possible avoid placing the crib near the window. As your baby grows into a toddler and s/he attempts to climb out of the crib; s/he could possibly fall which could cause serious injury to your baby.
Blankets and your baby are not necessarily a good mix. With the incidents of SIDS today, you want to be sure to do everything that could possibly put your infant at risk. It is more advisable to put your baby to bed in a sleeper. If you absolutely have to have a blanket on the baby, tuck it tightly around and under the foot of the mattress with your baby's feet touching the footboard. Also you don't want to put the blanket any higher on the baby than up to his chest as that will help prevent him from slipping under the blankets and suffocating.
Bumper pads are a great concept but unless they are secured properly, there is a risk of your baby slipping between the mattress and the bumpers and possibly suffocating. If you use them they should be anchored in at least eight places one at each corner of the crib and at least two spaced evenly on each of the sides. There should be a total of 16 ties in all, for the top and bottom.
Mobiles are a nice addition and look adorable but... the caution here is that if you use a mobile as soon as your baby starts to sit up on his own the mobile should be taken down to prevent your baby from getting tangled in it. Also make sure that it has no small removable parts that your baby could choke on.
If your crib is second hand no matter whether you had for a previous child or you got it from someone else check out the mattress carefully. Make sure there are no cracks or holes in the mattress covering. Make sure too that the mattress properly fits in the crib. Here again, your child could slip between the mattress and the sidebars or the end boards and suffocate. The mattress should fit snugly in the crib. Now the sheets you use in your baby's crib should also fit properly and not slip and slide. Sheet anchors are available that hook on the sheet under the mattress and keep it in place.
The position of the mattress is imperative for your child's safety. Most parents put the mattress at the highest position when the baby first comes home because it is so much easier to change him in that position. As your baby becomes more active you will want to lower the mattress accordingly. Once your baby is able to pull up to a standing position put the mattress in the lowest possible position and to be sure your baby is safe, measure the distance between the top of the side bar and the mattress. In the lowest position the distance of the top of the side bar should be no more than 26 inches above the mattress. If your child's head is over the side bar or they climb out of the crib, it maybe time to move your child to a regular bed. Some cribs are convertible into beds tat will grow with your child.
The crib itself should be looked over for things that might put your baby at risk. Have you seen those cribs that have ornate designs carved into the end boards? They are beautiful but they pose a danger to your child. Your child could get his head or arm and leg caught and sustain an injury. The simpler the design of the crib the safer your child may be.
Since approximately 1974 federal safety guidelines for cribs state that the slats should be no more than 2 3/8 inches apart. This is to prevent your baby from getting his head stuck between the slats. This could cause injury to your baby but it would necessitate the removal of some of the slats and that alone would.
Author Bio
Martin Smith is a successful freelance writer providing advice for consumers on purchasing a variety of Baby Crib Bedding and more! His numerous articles provide a wonderfully researched resource of interesting and relevant information.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
Congratulations! You have just learned that you are having a baby. Whether this is your first or not you need to look at cribs. Do you have one already? Is it an antique? A second hand crib whether antique or not needs to be carefully looked at. This is for the safety of your new baby.
The screws, bolts, and/or other fasteners should all be in place. Are they loose? Will the position of the mattress hold under your baby's weight? It is imperative that this be tested before you put your baby in the crib. Take something that approximates the weight of your baby at about 4 months old. Bounce it off the mattress to be certain it will hold its position. If it doesn't it could cause serious injury to your baby or worse.
When setting up the nursery (if it isn't already up) consider very carefully where you will place the crib. If you place the crib near a window and you have Venetian blinds, either shorten the cords or anchor them somewhere that your baby can't reach and get a hold of them. If it all possible avoid placing the crib near the window. As your baby grows into a toddler and s/he attempts to climb out of the crib; s/he could possibly fall which could cause serious injury to your baby.
Blankets and your baby are not necessarily a good mix. With the incidents of SIDS today, you want to be sure to do everything that could possibly put your infant at risk. It is more advisable to put your baby to bed in a sleeper. If you absolutely have to have a blanket on the baby, tuck it tightly around and under the foot of the mattress with your baby's feet touching the footboard. Also you don't want to put the blanket any higher on the baby than up to his chest as that will help prevent him from slipping under the blankets and suffocating.
Bumper pads are a great concept but unless they are secured properly, there is a risk of your baby slipping between the mattress and the bumpers and possibly suffocating. If you use them they should be anchored in at least eight places one at each corner of the crib and at least two spaced evenly on each of the sides. There should be a total of 16 ties in all, for the top and bottom.
Mobiles are a nice addition and look adorable but... the caution here is that if you use a mobile as soon as your baby starts to sit up on his own the mobile should be taken down to prevent your baby from getting tangled in it. Also make sure that it has no small removable parts that your baby could choke on.
If your crib is second hand no matter whether you had for a previous child or you got it from someone else check out the mattress carefully. Make sure there are no cracks or holes in the mattress covering. Make sure too that the mattress properly fits in the crib. Here again, your child could slip between the mattress and the sidebars or the end boards and suffocate. The mattress should fit snugly in the crib. Now the sheets you use in your baby's crib should also fit properly and not slip and slide. Sheet anchors are available that hook on the sheet under the mattress and keep it in place.
The position of the mattress is imperative for your child's safety. Most parents put the mattress at the highest position when the baby first comes home because it is so much easier to change him in that position. As your baby becomes more active you will want to lower the mattress accordingly. Once your baby is able to pull up to a standing position put the mattress in the lowest possible position and to be sure your baby is safe, measure the distance between the top of the side bar and the mattress. In the lowest position the distance of the top of the side bar should be no more than 26 inches above the mattress. If your child's head is over the side bar or they climb out of the crib, it maybe time to move your child to a regular bed. Some cribs are convertible into beds tat will grow with your child.
The crib itself should be looked over for things that might put your baby at risk. Have you seen those cribs that have ornate designs carved into the end boards? They are beautiful but they pose a danger to your child. Your child could get his head or arm and leg caught and sustain an injury. The simpler the design of the crib the safer your child may be.
Since approximately 1974 federal safety guidelines for cribs state that the slats should be no more than 2 3/8 inches apart. This is to prevent your baby from getting his head stuck between the slats. This could cause injury to your baby but it would necessitate the removal of some of the slats and that alone would.
Author Bio
Martin Smith is a successful freelance writer providing advice for consumers on purchasing a variety of Baby Crib Bedding and more! His numerous articles provide a wonderfully researched resource of interesting and relevant information.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
Can You Stay Home
Can You Stay Home?
By: Stephanie Foster
One of the first things you have to figure out when you realize that you want to stay home with your kids is whether or not you can afford to do so. You are probably used to living on two incomes, so making the switch to a single income may not be easy. However, it may not be as hard as you think.
If you have children already, the first thing that goes away when you decide to stay at home is the cost of daycare. However, if you work at home, part of that cost may remain, unless your work is such that you can keep the children home with you. Take a look at how much of your income right now is going to daycare. That cost alone may prove to you that you don't need a high-paying work at home job to stay home - a simpler one may suffice.
There are several other costs that will drop if you stay at home. You'll be in a different tax bracket. You'll probably drive less, eat out less often and you won't need clothes for work, which can save both on shopping and on dry cleaning bills.
When you're figuring out how much it costs you to work outside the home, don't assume that becoming a stay at home or work at home parent will cause you to stop eating out. You will have those days where you decide to take the kids out, more likely than not.
One thing many parents forget to think about when they decide to stay at home is to handle retirement planning. Now, if you're just staying home for a year or two, it's probably not a big deal, but if you plan on staying home for many years, this can be a huge impact on you when you do retire. You may not have the finances to fund your retirement account well when your family is living on only one income, but you should try to do at least a little. See my article on retirement planning for stay at home parents for more information.
Use this information to figure out what you will need to earn while staying at home. Some will be fine as a single income family, but others will need the stay at home parent to earn some kind of income. Ideally, this will be a relatively small amount, as the whole point of having a stay at home parent is to have more time with the kids and benefit them, not maintain a freely spending lifestyle. However, if a single income isn't enough, a work at home job or home business will likely become necessary.
Figure out how much income will be necessary and how much risk you are willing to take. Work at home jobs are harder to come by, but home businesses are by their nature more risky, and it may take a few years to earn an adequate income from a business. Plan accordingly, and know that you might not be able to live your preferred lifestyle right away.
Fortunately, by the time you take out the costs of working outside the home, you will likely find you don't need to earn what you used to. Half or even less of your previous income may be quite adequate. It may require sacrifice, but that's what being a parent is about.
Author Bio
Stephanie Foster is the owner of Home with the Kids, a resource for stay at home parents. To learn more about being a successful stay at home parent, please subscribe to the newsletter at www.homewiththekids.com/newsletter
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
By: Stephanie Foster
One of the first things you have to figure out when you realize that you want to stay home with your kids is whether or not you can afford to do so. You are probably used to living on two incomes, so making the switch to a single income may not be easy. However, it may not be as hard as you think.
If you have children already, the first thing that goes away when you decide to stay at home is the cost of daycare. However, if you work at home, part of that cost may remain, unless your work is such that you can keep the children home with you. Take a look at how much of your income right now is going to daycare. That cost alone may prove to you that you don't need a high-paying work at home job to stay home - a simpler one may suffice.
There are several other costs that will drop if you stay at home. You'll be in a different tax bracket. You'll probably drive less, eat out less often and you won't need clothes for work, which can save both on shopping and on dry cleaning bills.
When you're figuring out how much it costs you to work outside the home, don't assume that becoming a stay at home or work at home parent will cause you to stop eating out. You will have those days where you decide to take the kids out, more likely than not.
One thing many parents forget to think about when they decide to stay at home is to handle retirement planning. Now, if you're just staying home for a year or two, it's probably not a big deal, but if you plan on staying home for many years, this can be a huge impact on you when you do retire. You may not have the finances to fund your retirement account well when your family is living on only one income, but you should try to do at least a little. See my article on retirement planning for stay at home parents for more information.
Use this information to figure out what you will need to earn while staying at home. Some will be fine as a single income family, but others will need the stay at home parent to earn some kind of income. Ideally, this will be a relatively small amount, as the whole point of having a stay at home parent is to have more time with the kids and benefit them, not maintain a freely spending lifestyle. However, if a single income isn't enough, a work at home job or home business will likely become necessary.
Figure out how much income will be necessary and how much risk you are willing to take. Work at home jobs are harder to come by, but home businesses are by their nature more risky, and it may take a few years to earn an adequate income from a business. Plan accordingly, and know that you might not be able to live your preferred lifestyle right away.
Fortunately, by the time you take out the costs of working outside the home, you will likely find you don't need to earn what you used to. Half or even less of your previous income may be quite adequate. It may require sacrifice, but that's what being a parent is about.
Author Bio
Stephanie Foster is the owner of Home with the Kids, a resource for stay at home parents. To learn more about being a successful stay at home parent, please subscribe to the newsletter at www.homewiththekids.com/newsletter
Article Source: http://www.ArticleGeek.com - Free Website Content
Jumat, 19 Februari 2010
Picking Furniture for a Nurser
Picking Furniture for a Nursery
Furnishing a nursery can be a wonderful time for an expectant mother. Not only is it fun to prepare for the birth of a baby, but it gives the expectant mother an outlet for those nesting instincts that will soon kick in. A lot of well-meaning people (i.e. parents and in-laws) will convince you that you simply must have certain furniture for your new baby's room.
Some of the furniture you will likely consider includes:
- Bassinette
- Crib
- Changing table
- Dresser
- Rocking chair
A bassinette is handy for keeping the new baby very close. Most are portable so you can roll them throughout the house. If someone offers to loan you a bassinette, take them up on it as long as the mattress is clean and in good shape. You'll only use a bassinette for a short period of time, so why invest in it as a major piece of furniture?
A crib, however, is a different story. If you plan for your child to sleep on his or her own at all, you will want a crib. It's not as safe to borrow a crib from someone and while cribs are a type of baby furniture that have sentimental attachments, don't agree to use an old crib because it was the one your husband used when he was a baby. Safety standards have changed dramatically and what was once considered safe furniture, might not be now. Look online to find baby crib safety standards. Make sure any spindles on the bed are placed close enough so that the baby cannot get his or her head stuck between them. Also, make sure there's no lead paint on the bed. If you're like most mothers, you'll feel better about your baby's safety if you buy new or one that was just recently used by someone you know.
Do you need a changing table? Mothers went for years without this piece of furniture. But, they are nice to have and at a convenient height that saves some back strain. It's a matter of available space, available money and your willingness to bend over to change a diaper!
A dresser, if bought to last for years, would be a good furniture investment. Don't waste money on a cutesy theme dresser that the baby will only outgrow when he or she starts to develop personal tastes. Instead, think about the rest of your house. Do you have a lot of mahogany furniture or a lot of white painted furniture? Buy a dresser that you can move elsewhere in the house if your child decides he or she hates it down the road. Buy solid wood. The furniture will last longer and it will contain fewer chemicals than cheaper veneer furniture pieces often include in the processing stage or in the glue used to hold pieces together.
Everyone thinks you need a rocking chair if you have a baby. Is it a necessary piece of furniture for the nursery? Not if you have a rocking chair somewhere else in the house. No mother or baby wants to spend all their time in the nursery anyway. Use rocking time in another room to give you both a change of pace - unless you just want to buy a rocker.
Author Bio
Bob Benson is the founder of Furniture online. You can check out our website at www.my-wicker-furniture.info.
Seventeen Reasons To Homeschool Your Kids
Seventeen Reasons To Homeschool Your Kids
Homeschooling was once a rare educational method. Today it is well known and an accepted way to education your kids.
Most parents thinking of homeschooling have a difficult time deciding whether to do it or not. The following is a list 17 reasons why other parents are homeschooling their kids. And, there is one important question you must answer correctly if you expect to succeed in homeschooling. This will be given to you at the end of this article.
- Private school is to expensive
- Their children have problems learning in school or have a hard time getting along with other kids
- They have special health needs
- They are unhappy with the public school curriculum
- They want their kids to have a better education
- They enjoy homeschooling and being with their children
- They don't want their kids to be badly influenced by other kid and learn their bad behaviors
- They want their kids to learn the skills they need to succeed in life
- They want their kids to receive an education that caters to their interests, ability level and aspirations
- They move around, following husbands work, and this is a way to keep the family together
- Their kids would get the individual attention they really needed
- It gives the kids a chance to become who they really are by giving them more freedom to express themselves than public schools would allow.
- The want to see their kid grow and turn into wonderful, capable, loving person.
- They want a way of life that allows the whole family to be together
- They feel they are releasing their kids to strangers to raise them and this is not what they want to do
- Their own educational philosophy greatly differs with the public school education.
- academic research
- legal homeschool rulings
- homeschooling practicals
- schooling materials
- how much it will cost
- how to evaluate what you are doing
Finally, the most important question you have to answer if you are planning to homeschool your kids is:
Do you really enjoy being and spending time with your kids? The question is, if you enjoy spending a lot of time with your kids every day. You must like being with your kids most of the time and if you don't then most likely, homeschooling is not for you.
Author Bio
For more tips and information about homeschooling and a special email course on homeschooling go to: www.for--you.com/homeschooling2
Rudy Silva has a BA Physics degree and is a Natural Nutritional trainer, teaching people how to gain good health.
Being What We Want to See
Being What We Want to See
My parents had just come home from a farmer's market and noticed an extra bag of peaches.
"You have to take these back," my mom told my dad. "WE HAVE KIDS. We can't keep something we didn't pay for."
My mother was putting her finger on an essential truth: Kids absorb the values they see adults putting into action.
Ever notice how quickly kids spot any inconsistency between what we say and what we do? Long before kids can spell "hypocrisy," they notice when our actions fall short of our words.
"Don't worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you," author Robert Fulghum says.
Kids need to see us "walking the talk."
IN FACT, WE TEACH KIDS BEST WHEN WE PRACTICE "BEING WHAT WE WANT TO SEE" IN THEM.
If you volunteer in your child's school, you might have noticed that savvy teachers practice "being what they want to see" in their students.
These teachers encourage respect by speaking respectfully to their students, even when correcting them. They teach self-control by sticking to "indoor voices" in the classroom, especially in situations that could provoke angry shouting.
"Being what we want to see" isn't always easy - though perhaps it's easier with other people's children!
At home one day, I found myself shouting "STOP YELLING!" at the top of my lungs. I caught the inconsistency between my words and behavior about two seconds before my child commented on it.
OUR EXAMPLE POWERFULLY INFLUENCES OUR CHILDREN'S CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT.
If we vent our anger through yelling, put-downs or sarcasm, that's how our kids will learn to handle their anger.
I once heard a preschool teacher say that by listening to the children, she could tell exactly how their mothers spoke to their husbands!
If we respond to unpleasant situations with kindness, self-control and respect, then our kids will learn that.
Not all at once, and not perfectly. But surely.
And that extra bag of peaches?
Soon after my dad left to return them, the phone rang.
"We stopped by, but you weren't home," my grandmother said. "Did you get the bag of peaches we left you?"
We all shared a big laugh when my dad got home. And more than 35 years later, whenever a clerk makes an error in my favor, I remember the peaches.
Author Bio
Norma Schmidt, M.A., M.Div., is a parent of two and a former Lutheran minister with experience as a pastor and a cancer center chaplain. She gives workshops on parenting and on living with illness. To get her free report, "61 Great Ways to Teach Kids About Money," visit www.ParentCafeOnline.com/pages/53/index.htm
DNA Paternity Testing - 5 key questions you should ask your DNA testing provider
DNA Paternity Testing - 5 key questions you should ask your DNA testing provider.
DNA paternity testing in its purest form is the application of DNA technology to provide information about the parentage of an individual (usually a child). The mother of the child is rarely disputed, and most of the time DNA testing is requested to inform the likely father of a child.
DNA is inherited from our parents, with half coming from the mother, and the other half from the father. This pattern of inheritance allows the opportunity where the mother of the child is not disputed, to produce a putative DNA profile of the biological father. The process is relatively simple in that the final DNA profile of the child is composed of a series of bands which can only come from the two parents. If the mother's bands are deducted from the child profile the remainder must come from the biological father. Any male that may consider himself the father can have a DNA profile produced and compared against the remaining bands in the child's profile.
There can only be two outcomes from this type of comparison. The first is a 'no-match' scenario where the remaining bands in the child's profile could not have come from the sample obtained from the alleged father. This is known as exclusion and eliminates the possibility of this individual being the biological father of the child. The second is a 'match' scenario where the remaining bands in the child's profile could all be accounted for by comparison with the alleged father. If this is the case the significance of the match needs to be assessed by a DNA interpretation expert who will provide a degree of certainty associated with the likelihood that the alleged male is the biological father of the child.
Before you commission any Paternity DNA testing you should be sure you have clear answers to the following 5 key questions:
1. Has the DNA testing facility been accredited by a validated external body such as the American Association of Blood Banks (AABB). If the answer is no, do not have your testing done by this company, you may not be able to rely on the results.
2. Does the company carrying out the DNA testing have a thorough track-record in this area of work, and have they proved their technology in court? Be wary of companies that sub-contract their testing. DNA profile interpretation can be a tricky business, and there is a lot at stake when you commission a DNA test, and you want reassurance on the reliability of your service provider.
3. Is the company you are planning to use an accredited laboratory or merely a broker? Brokers are simply in this game to make money, and have no interest in the quality or the impact of this life changing technology. Avoid them irrespective of the tempting pricing they may offer you.
4. What degree of certainty does the company provide in relation to the results of the tests? An exclusion should be 100% with an inclusion at, at least 99.99% confidence levels. These are the figures that are expected in a court of law.
5. Does the internal quality standard require duplication of all results before they are reported to the customer? This is an industry standard requirement which is often overlooked by some of the 'cheaper' DNA testing providers.
If the answer to any of these questions is unclear, my strong advice is to find an alternative provider. You simply do not want to trust such an important piece of work to a company that does not guarantee a top quality product, with excellent customer care back-up.
If you want to find out more about DNA Paternity Testing click on the links in the author section below.
Author Bio
Peter Vine is a successful online publisher of Home-DNA-Test-Expert.com
He provides practical advice and the latest information on all aspects of DNA Paternity Testing, which you can readily research on his website.
The Four Parenting Styles
The Four Parenting Styles
The following article offers some insight to those involved in the wonderful world known as Parenting.
There are just as many parenting styles as there are a number of parents. Experts believe the parenting styles fall into 4 different and identifiable styles: authoritarian, indulgent, authoritative, and uninvolved.
Let's examine this more closely. The first parenting style is that of the authoritarian parent. These parents are like army commanders. They prefer to issue commands and orders to their children and fully expect their children to carry out their orders without questioning them. Authoritarians do not welcome nor appreciate any feedback from their children. They live by set and defined rules in a structured environment.. These children as we now know, are generally considered to have an unhappy nature about them. Boys generally exhibit hostile behaviour when dealing with frustration, whereas girls tend to give up easily when faced with difficult situations. Both the boys and girls however, tend to perform better in school due to their disciplined upbringing.
The second parenting style is the indulgent parent. These parents are generally lenient. They allow a variety of behaviours by their children that some would describe as immature. Essentially, they let the children look after themselves and avoid confronting them at all costs. Indulgent parents may also be described as non-directive or democratic. Non-directive parents are known to parent by default, that is, by taking virtually no action in parenting of their children. Democratic parents, though lenient, are more aware and show a committment to engage with their children.
The third parenting style is that of the authoritative parent. These parents are both demanding and responsive at the same time. Authoritative parents while expecting their their children to behave in a certain manner, don't impose their authority and welcome a certain amount of questioning. They demonstrate a combination of assertiveness coupled with the ability to respond to their children's feedback. These children appear to be more lively and have a happier disposition about them. Their self-confidence is more developed they seem to be more sure of their abilities. These children also show better emotional control and are more adept in their social skills. Gender stereotypes are also less of an issue with authoritative parents, as they tend to be more open minded in their outlook towards their children's behaviour, i.e. boys playing with dolls and girls playing with tools.
Lastly, we look at the parenting style known as "uninvolved parenting". As the name suggests, these parents are simply uninvolved. They are neither demanding nor responsive of their children and they are not interested in any feedback from them. These parents are the most likely to be irresponsible and more often neglect their children.
We hope you found the above information insightful and will seek out the many more resources available on this topic online.
Author Bio
Hanif Khaki is the acclaimed author of numerous parenting related articles and the founder of the popular parenting resource site www.parenting-info.inform-about.com
Educating Your Children: The Home Shooling Option
Educating Your Children: The Home Schooling Option
An ever growing number of thoughtful parents are concerned about the status of public schools in many cites across North America. At the same time, a good number of families are struggling to make ends meet. They simply do not have excess funds available to send their children to private schools. One solution that many families are embracing is home schooling. With each passing school year, more and more families in North America -- indeed, in many countries around the world -- are electing the home schooling for their children.
There are some definite benefits and specific drawbacks to choosing home schooling for your children. Turning to the positive elements of home schooling first, chief amongst them is the fact that parents have greater control over the education of their children.
One of the more significant complaints frequently expressed about both public and private schools is the lack of input and control a parent has over the education of his or her child or children. While there are certain educational standards that must be met when it comes to home schooling, a parent has a significant degree of discretion over how his or her child or children will be taught.
In addition to more control over the educational process, most parents who are involved in the home schooling of their children believe that their children are obtaining a far better course of education. Many of these parents simply believe that public schools are not up to muster and that home schooling ensures that their children will be properly educated.
Of course, when contrasting home schooling with the private school alternative, educating your children at home is significantly less expensive. The tuition costs and other fees associated with most private schools continue to increase each and every year. As a result, many families simply have been priced out of the private school market all together.
People who are involved in home schooling believe that educating children at home works to develop a stronger bond between parents and children. The very fact that children will be spending more time with their parents because of being schooled in the home enriches the relationship between the generations.
There are some drawbacks to home schooling as well. The primary complaint that some education experts have in regard to home schooling is based on the need for children to interact socially with other children. These experts maintain that one of the most important components of attending school -- be it in a public or private setting -- are the opportunities for children to interact with each other. These opportunities are more limited when a child is home schooled.
With that said, there are now different organizations and associations that have been formed that bring children who are home schooled together for different activities and events. Home schooling advocates assert that these activities and events allow children who are home schooled ample opportunity to interact with other children their own ages.
Most education analysts believe that the trend towards home schooling will continue onward into the immediate future. These experts believe that an ever growing number of parents are going to elect to educate their children at home as an alternative to problematic public schools and expensive private schools.
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Changing Your Child's Behavior With Positive Reinforcement
Think about your interactions with your children today. How many things did you notice they did wrong? What did you do or say to them because of their wrong doings? Have they engaged in the same kind of behavior before? What did you do or say the times before? Is it working? How many things did you notice your children did right today? If you did take the time to notice, what did you do or say to them? Did you praise or reward them in some way? If so, then read no further and keep up the good work. If you could use a little work on doing this, then read on.
Let's face it. We parents often neglect to notice the positive things our children do. Rather, we tend to focus on our children's negative behaviors, because they either annoy us or otherwise make our lives difficult. Have you ever heard the phrase, "that which gets noticed gets repeated?" If all we ever notice is the negative things our children do, then why would they do anything different? It is as if we program our children to believe "if I'm only noticed when I do something wrong, then so be it."
It is just as important, if not more, to notice our children's positive behaviors. Remember most behaviors are controlled by their consequences. Some may believe rewarding kids for positive behavior is bribery. We all receive rewards daily for doing things well, at work, at home, and at play. These rewards often motivate us to continue the behaviors for which they were received. Where parents use rewards ineffectively is when they give a positive consequence to stop an inappropriate behavior. For example, "I'll give you a cookie if you stop whining." This only encourages the inappropriate behavior. Where as rewarding kids for their positive behaviors is quite the opposite and much more productive.
Using positive reinforcement to strengthen a desired behavior is easy. Just watch and wait for the behavior to occur then reinforce it with praise, a pat on the back or a special privilege. It may go something like this, "David, I really appreciate how you came in the house when I asked and you even did it without a big hassle. You should feel good about being able to do that." How about, "Wow Jamie, your bedroom looks awesome. You must have worked really hard on it. I bet you worked up a healthy appetite. Why don't you decide what we have for lunch today."
Focusing on your children's positive behaviors could be the most productive parenting change you make if you don't already do it. Chances are you have been trained like the rest of us to only call attention to the bad things your kids do. This phenomenon isn't found solely in the parent/child relationship. It is also prevalent in spousal, sibling and employee/employer relationships. When was the last time your boss called you into his office and asked you to shut the door? Was it because he just wanted to tell you what a wonderful job you are doing and how valuable of an employee you are? If so, lucky you. More than likely, it was because he wanted to talk to you about something he thought you could do better or you were doing something wrong. People tend to take positive behavior for granted and punish negative behaviors.
Some parents find it helpful to make a note and put it where they can see it often. The note might read, "notice the positive" or "catch'em doing good." You may also want to consider using a jar of consequences, a parenting tool that parents can use to help them focus on and reinforce the positive behaviors their children exhibit.
Catch your kids being good. It could have a profound affect on the atmosphere in your home. Whatever it takes I assure you it will be worth it.
Author Bio
Destry Maycock, MSW has had over eleven years experience working with children and families as a professional social worker. Destry has helped hundreds of parents solve a variety of parenting challenges and strengthen their relationships with their children. Destry enjoys developing tools that help parents with the difficult but rewarding duty of raising children. His most recent creations can be found at www.parentingstore.com
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